Why on earth is a book about Twilight in this section? I mean, I love all things Twilight, but this just seemed odd. Then I saw the rest of the title…

Defining Twilight: Vocabulary Workbook for Unlocking the SAT, ACT, GED, and SSAT

*blink*

Can you resist the allure of Edward’s myriad charms—his ocher eyes and tousled hair, the cadence of his speech, his chiseled alabaster skin, and his gratuitous charm? Will you hunt surreptitiously and tolerate the ceaseless deluge in Forks to evade the sun and uphold the facade? Join Edward and Bella as you learn more than 600 vocabulary words to improve your score on the *SAT, ACT^®, GED^®, and SSAT^® exams!

I am baffled yet completely delighted that this book exists.

But I wasn’t there to find help for the SAT so I turned around and scanned the three shelves devoted to books about the GRE. Yes. Three shelves full.

I plopped on the floor and started comparing the different books and finally concluded that they’re probably all about the same. I ended up picking one of the larger ones because if it has more pages it likely covers more information.

So now I’m armed and ready. I bought a new calculator (apparently someone who hasn’t done real math in 9 years doesn’t own one anymore) and pens/pencils and a fresh notebook.

Then I decided to tell my parents. Well, two of them at least. I told my mom, and as I expected she wasn’t thrilled about it. I had to ask her to please not be negative and to just be excited with me. It didn’t work. Then she was convinced my stepdad would agree with her so she made sure to tell me to talk to him about it. His response? Honey you can do whatever you want to do in this world. And then he offered to pay for me to take the GRE.

At least one member of my family is showing me support. It’s kind of sad that it’s someone I pick to be in my family, rather than someone who is family by blood or law.

But she’ll come around.

I’m still  unemployed. The job search definitely has me down. So I was thinking today. What would I do if I could do anything in the whole wide world? That answer is simple. I’d run a bookstore. Preferably my own bookstore, in an old two story farmhouse. I’d turn part of it into a cafe. Doesn’t that sound heavenly? But then I started thinking some more. Okay, the dream job is pretty much intangible right now. Maybe when I’m 60. Maybe. What about right now? The next best this is to be a librarian.

I’ve had this thought on and off since I was in college, but I knew you have to go to graduate school in order to be a librarian so it was never something I seriously considered. Until now.

I’m already in the middle of a career change. There aren’t many NPO’s out there hiring a database manager, so I’m applying for any jobs at all in any field that I can somehow kinda sorta finagle experience in. So why not go all the way and go for a career I’ll love?

I wish I’d thought of this last spring. As it is, it’s impossible for me to get accepted anywhere for the Spring semester. The application deadlines are October 15th, and even if I could scrape up the application fees in time, there’s no way at all I can take the GRE and have the scores ready by then. So I’m looking at March 15 for my deadline for the summer semester.

What that means right now is I have time to breathe (even if my hyper excited brain doesn’t want me to), research the programs around (for example, UNC has an accredited program and ECU has an online program in the process of being accredited), study (how the heck do you do that again?), and take the GRE at my leisure.

And then realize I don’t know how I’ll pay for grad school and start freaking out again.

But I want this. More than I’ve wanted anything in a very long time. I still have to find a job. I won’t be able to afford the application fees and test fees without it! But at least now I have a goal in mind: a direction for my life. I’m not just floundering about anymore.

So here it is, folks. I’m planning to apply for admission to a graduate program to obtain a Masters of Library Science.

I’m scared to death but completely excited.