Category Archives: Personal

This is by far the best Christmas season I’ve had in years. I’m loving being here with all of my family. It’s just… awesome.

I haven’t had a Christmas tree, nor helped put one up, in several years. So this year, it was thrilling for me to put up not one, not two, but three Christmas trees!

First, there’s mom’s:

Please forgive the poor quality – I took it with my cell phone. And with that kind of light in the background, there wasn’t a whole lot I could do.

We had a good time putting up this “Charlie Brown” tree (that’s what I call it – it’s scrawny!). She had kept all of the ornaments from my childhood. We went through them all – I got to keep about half of them and the other half we put on her tree. How nice it was to reminisce about the best Christmases we ever had.

Then we went to my Granny’s house to put up her tree.

Two years ago was the first (and only) time she put up this tree. I like it better this year than I did when she had the professionals put it up for her.

And lastly… here’s the one at our house. Covered in remnants of my childhood. My stepdad actually got choked up while we were decorating this afternoon (which of course, made me a little teary eyed myself).

I’m loving Christmas this year.

I know. I know!

I never write anymore.

That’s what happens when you don’t have internet at home anymore. The blogging mentality is still there. I can’t count the number of times a day something happens and I think that I can’t wait to write about it. But by the time I actually have a connection and time to write something… my thoughts are all on old news.

Boring.

So… it looks like I’m turning more into a tweeter than a blogger. I can always text to Twitter from my phone, so I do that often. If you’re not following me… do it!

At least that way you get something from me.

Wow. That came out more bitter than I expected it to. But it’s pretty accurate. You probably already know that I didn’t get the job.

Bummer.

I’ve spent the day fighting tears. And being angry. And then trying to remember that it’s just a job and there are others and somehow it will work out. I did, however, apply for 9 other jobs today.

It’s just frustrating because I really feel like if I get excited or hopeful about something, that automatically negates it and it won’t happen. At least, that’s been the trend for the last several months.

Excited about a guy? Bomb.
Excited about a job? Nope, not gonna happen.
Excited about a new tv show? Gets canceled.

Seriously. My whole life is kind of fail. Am I cursed?

In other news… wait, I’m not sure there is any other news. I still don’t have internet at home. Driving 20 miles a day to get a free wifi connection is getting really old. REALLY old.

But seriously, how does one function without the internet? It’s how you pay bills, apply for jobs, connect with people. And I actually think when I get home my tv will be gone because my stepdad’s mom is visiting (possibly moving in) and she gets the tv. So I get to go home to a house in BFE with no tv and no internet.

And that seriously affects my mood.

I have one. Or something that resembles one.

I seem to be staying busy these days. Which is good – I have no internet access at home anymore. I have to drive half an hour or more to get to Starbucks, Panera, or Barnes and Noble to use wifi. So my internet usage is WAY down. Luckily I can still text to Twitter to Facebook.

I had an interview on Tuesday, and when I came out I wasn’t very confident I’d get the job. Then on Thursday I got called back for a second interview on Friday. Now? I’m super excited about this job and I really really hope I get it. Hopefully I’ll find out this week.

…so little blog space.

Okay, not really. I pretty much have unlimited space. But no one would read it if I put everything down!

I realized today that I’ve left the house to do something/be busy everyday since LAST Wednesday. And really, in the last two weeks, there were only two days where I didn’t go anywhere. I’ve joined a women’s a capella group called Carolina Chords and so far I’m really enjoying it.

Today was crazy hectic. I was supposed to go with my mom and granny to a quilt show in Sanford, but my mom called me this morning sick, so she couldn’t go. So I went without her. And I drove from Franklinton to Pittsboro (about an hour and 15 minutes) to pick up Granny, then drove to Sanford (about 30 minutes), stayed at the quilt show for only around half an hour (it sucked), then drove to Asheboro (about 45 minutes), then drove to Durham (about an hour) then drove BACK to Pittsboro (30 mins) then finally drove home to Franklinton (took me an hour and a half).

But it was a really good day. I enjoyed spending the day with my Granny, and she enjoyed having a chauffeur!

On Monday, I’m getting a new laptop. Mom has requested hers back, so we worked out a budget for what we could afford and on Monday I get a computer of my very own. SO. EXCITED. I haven’t owned a new computer in more than five years. This one got put on clearance today and there’s ONE left. The manager of the store is holding it for me until 2 on Monday. SQUEEEEE.

A recruiter called me this week because she pulled my resume off Career Builder. Who would have thought people actually search resumes for potential employees instead of waiting for people to apply? Now, unfortunately I don’t have all the experience the guy was wanting (Raiser’s Edge is great, but I don’t have QuickBooks ), but she’s trying to find out if he’d be willing to train me on it. She was supposed to call me back today, and didn’t. If I haven’t heard from her by Monday afternoon, I’ll be giving her a call back. And she did tell me if this position didn’t work out, she’d still love to have me register with her staffing agency for other temp positions. That’d be okay with me at this point.

So things are looking really good right now. !!

I miss you.

It’s been over a year and still, you cross my thoughts. A lot, lately. I still don’t know what happened in your head to make you shut down so fast, but the good times were so good.

I want that again. But I fear I’ll never have it again. When you couldn’t wait to talk to me and I couldn’t wait to talk to you. When we neglected things in our individual lives to be with each other.

It was almost the fairy tale.

I’ve finally calmed down enough to write this. A little over an hour ago, Hojo somehow got inside the pen. I went out to check on Mae Belle at around 11. I’d checked at 10:30 and she was fine. Hojo was outside of the pen, not even barking anymore. At 11, I looked. And Hojo was inside the pen. Laying at the door, waiting to be let out.

My beautiful sweet little Mae Belle is no longer with us. I’m so sorry you trusted me to protect you and I didn’t. I’m so sorry.

Yes folks. I had a baby. A beautiful baby girl.

Meet Mae Belle Ottaway.

Awesome rain drop on her forehead. We’re not really sure what she is. I know she’s got lab in her. Maybe boxer too?

Tomorrow I’ll take some better pictures of her. Tonight though, I’m a little freaked out. She’s not allowed in the house, so she’s out in the dog pen. And Hojo, one of my stepdad’s german shepherds, is not exactly thrilled that there’s a new dog out there. He’s stalking the pen and completely traumatizing Mae Belle.

Keisha, the other german shepherd, finally got tired and came back to the porch and laid down. I’m hoping Hojo will do the same so that all the dogs can get some sleep, and maybe lil Miss Mae Belle won’t be scarred for life. =/

Just not the record I wanted to set…

From Daily Kos:

Another 216,000 Americans joined the ranks of the officially unemployed in August, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics nonfarm payroll survey. It was the 20th straight month of net job losses. The unemployment rate rose to 9.7%, the highest rate in 26 years. Since the recession began in December 2007, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, joblessness has risen by 7.4 million, and there are now a total of 14.9 million Americans officially unemployed.

No wonder it feels hopeless.