There’s a new song on my continuous loop… can’t stop listening!!
I’m a Mama!
by MandiI’ve finally calmed down enough to write this. A little over an hour ago, Hojo somehow got inside the pen. I went out to check on Mae Belle at around 11. I’d checked at 10:30 and she was fine. Hojo was outside of the pen, not even barking anymore. At 11, I looked. And Hojo was inside the pen. Laying at the door, waiting to be let out.
My beautiful sweet little Mae Belle is no longer with us. I’m so sorry you trusted me to protect you and I didn’t. I’m so sorry.
Yes folks. I had a baby. A beautiful baby girl.
Meet Mae Belle Ottaway.
Awesome rain drop on her forehead. 
We’re not really sure what she is. I know she’s got lab in her. Maybe boxer too?
Tomorrow I’ll take some better pictures of her. Tonight though, I’m a little freaked out. She’s not allowed in the house, so she’s out in the dog pen. And Hojo, one of my stepdad’s german shepherds, is not exactly thrilled that there’s a new dog out there. He’s stalking the pen and completely traumatizing Mae Belle.
Keisha, the other german shepherd, finally got tired and came back to the porch and laid down. I’m hoping Hojo will do the same so that all the dogs can get some sleep, and maybe lil Miss Mae Belle won’t be scarred for life. =/
A Million Miles in a Thousand Years
by Mandi
I’ve wondered, though, if one of the reasons we fail to acknowledge the brilliance of life is because we don’t want the responsibility inherent in the acknowledgment. We don’t want to be characters in a story because characters have to move and breathe and face conflict with courage. And if life isn’t remarkable, then we don’t have to do any of that; we can be unwilling victims rather than grateful participants.
But I’ve noticed something. I’ve never walked out of a meaningless movie thinking all movies are meaningless. I only thought the movie I walked out on was meaningless. I wonder, then, if when people say life is meaningless, what they really mean is their lives are meaningless. I wonder if they’ve chosen to believe their whole existence is unremarkable, and are projecting their dreary life on the rest of us.
This was the first of many passages in Donald Miller’s new book that caused me to dog ear the page. At first I was hesitant to read this book, considering where I am in my faith, but I’m so glad I did.
This book is Don’s attempt to find meaning in life while editing his story for the Blue Like Jazz movie. And I see myself in the pages. He talks about taking the easy route – sitting in front of the tv and typing words on a computer, rather than going out and creating your own story. This is what I do. This is what I need to change.
And once you know what it takes to live a better story, you don’t have a choice. Not living a beter story would be like deciding to die, deciding to walk around numb until you die, and it’s not natural to want to die.
Pretty much. I’ve certainly been walking around numb. It’s time for a better story.
He also talks about how a character is what he does. A person is what he does – not what he thinks. This was a prevalent thought in the book, since the driving force behind the memoir was converting Blue Like Jazz to a screenplay. Part of what makes that book so great is the reader’s inability to get inside Don’s head. You can’t do that in a movie. You have to show it. A character is what he does. And the same is true in real life. You don’t know what I think or feel, only what I do. This is why he wrote, “The story we tell ourselves is very different from the story we tell the world.”
Perhaps one of the reasons I’ve avoided having a clear ambition is that second you stand up and point toward a horizon, you realize how much there is to lose.
…
It’s true that while ambition creates fear, it also creates the story. But it’s a good trade, because as soon as you point toward a horizon, life no longer feels meaningless. And suddenly there is risk in your story and a question about whether you’ll make it. You have a reason to get out of bed in the morning.
Let me just take a moment to testify to the truth in those words. I was fired 2 months ago, through no fault of my own. And that led to some of the most intense depression I’ve ever felt. I felt useless and worthless. Not finding a job increased those feelings, and with each unanswered application I sunk lower and lower.
Then one day I set a goal.
And it was like the weight of the world was lifted. My circumstances hadn’t changed. I’m still unemployed and I still got fired. But my perspective shifted. Because I set a goal.
Of course, setting that goal isn’t the end. Now we have to see if I have what it takes to attain that goal. I have to get off my ass and move. And it’s going to be hard. But it’ll be worth it.
But that goal is the beginning of my better story. The good news is that this happened before I read this book. This book is affirming what I want to do, rather than telling me to do it.
There are so many more passages I’d love to quote here, but really… you should just go read it yourself. It’s inspired and brilliant and life changing.
Can We Know Truth?
by MandiRan across this ad on dropping knowledge today, and well.. it speaks for itself.
It’s a Love Story
by MandiHere’s What I Think
by MandiA few things have really stood out to me in recent news.
1. Jon and Kate Plus 8 is now just Kate Plus 8. I’m actually really surprised that TLC is going to keep the show now that they’re planning a divorce. Although on second thought, I suppose watching a single mom raise 8 kids is even more “awesome” than a married couple. Anything for ratings, right? But it turns out that as news of this broke, Jon has decided he’s not sure that he really wants a divorce anymore.
That’s right. The same man who publically said he “despises” his wife, is rethinking the divorce. Oh wait, maybe it’s just the paycheck he’s thinking about?
But that does have me thinking… maybe one of the best jobs in this country right now is to have a ginormous family so you get all the free stuff you could possibly want and get close to 100 grand a week just to have film crews follow you around.
Any takers?
2. Raleigh, NC is finally enforcing a “panhandling permit.”
On one hand, I understand why you would want to enforce this. I really do. You want to be able to identify people standing around on the corners asking for money. You want to make sure that people’s safety is the primary concern.
But how many homeless people have a picture ID? The permit is free, but how is someone supposed to get an ID if they don’t have one? I hardly expect your average homeless person to be able to provide the necessary documentation to obtain a photo ID.
And the punishment for not having this permit? You’ll get arrested and fined. Yes, fined. Does anybody else see a problem there?
I don’t deny that something needs to change, but I’m certain this isn’t the solution.
3. There’s a new study out from the University of New Hampshire that says that spanking your children can lower their IQ by up to 5 points.
Hogwash, baloney, and applesauce.
Oh, wait. Did that just prove their point?
But seriously, I was spanked as a child. But I was smart enough not to need to be spanked often. Let me say that one more time. I was smart enough not to need to be spanked often. Doesn’t that one sentence negate that entire study?
I was listening to them talk about this on the radio today. One woman called in and talked about how the current one is a “generation of losers” and how kids today are animals. My initial reaction was right on sister! And then an 18 year old girl called in all offended because she and her siblings were good kids and had never been “hit” by a parent.
And I see two different issues there. First, I’ll admit it’s a little harsh to call an entire generation of discipline starved children “losers.” They aren’t. But there is definitely a difference in the way children and teenagers behave today than how they behaved when I was in school. And I’ve only been out of high school for 10 years. Nine and a half, actually. And it may be true that this girl is a fantastic kid and her siblings as well. But she’s going to be the exception, not the rule.
And this shift in thinking comes from people who equate spanking a child with hitting a child. My mother never hit me. My mother spanked me. There’s a marked difference. People who don’t know that difference shouldn’t touch their kids. They probably shouldn’t have kids.
And before I hear cries of child abuse! child abuse! from any of you, let’s look at a few of the instances where I was spanked as a child.
There was the time my mom had spent awhile cultivating and growing moss in our backyard. I liked to dig it up because the hole it left behind was the perfect size for a Barbie swimming pool. She told me if I did it again, I’d get a spanking. I agreed not to do it again, waited until she took a nap and went outside and dug it up. Yes, I got a spanking.
There was the time, when I lived with my dad, that there was a giant pile of cut trees out back. I loved to climb on them and play on them. My dad told me not to because it wasn’t safe. They were piled haphazardly and if I stepped wrong the pile could shift and crush me. I didn’t listen and got caught out there. I got a spanking.
There was the time when I was 13 (and incidentally, this was the last spanking I ever got) and my mom caught me with a cigarette lighter in my pocket. And I lied to her about why I had it. (Yes folks, I experimented with cigarettes at a young age.) I got a spanking.
Do I think I deserved it all of these times? Yes. I didn’t at the time of course, but looking back, I understand all of them. And they served their purpose.
And it didn’t lower my IQ.
