Let me go ahead and apologize ahead of time because this post is going to cover two polar opposite thoughts and feelings I had during a funeral today.

First, the irony. My great uncle died on Saturday. This was a man I’d seen only once or twice in the last 20 years – I really attended the funeral to show support for my grandaddy, as this was his last surviving sibling. One thing that struck me during the eulogy was how often the pastor referred to Uncle Darrel as a man who knew what he believed and was unwavering. He left behind a legacy because everyone knew who he was and what he stood for. In this case, it was Christ. Uncle Darrel was a man who had deep faith in Jesus Christ. As I was listening to the pastor speak about how you couldn’t change Uncle Darrel’s mind once he held a belief, I was struck by the thought that I want to leave that kind of legacy behind. I want to be known as a woman who held firm to her convictions. I call this ironic because I have been anything but unwavering these last few years (just click that link up there “Face the Strange” to see what I mean).  This is beginning to change, I think. A few things have happened this past week to really solidify my stance against Christianity. But I don’t want to be known as an atheist or an agnostic.  I don’t want my religion (or lack thereof) to define who I am. I want my actions to define who I am. And I hope that someday, people can look back on the life I lived and celebrate.

Now, for something completely different.

I hate Christian funerals. I really and truly despise them. Yes, there was a lot of good said at the funeral. He was a good man who would do near about anything you asked of him. But instead of using this time to celebrate a man’s life, people took the opportunity to use fear and bribery to try and convert everyone.

I’m accustomed to Southern conservative Christian funerals being a “salvation” sermon instead of a standard eulogy, but I guess I’d never really paid attention to it before because I was so involved. Basically, the message boiled down to “I know he’s in heaven; if you want to see him again, get saved!”

There was also your standard variation of hell sucks, if you want to avoid it get saved!

Where, in either of these two examples, is there a motive of becoming a Christian because you believe in the saving power of Jesus Christ?

According to these people, if your motive isn’t right then you’re not right. Yet… they’re bribing people and fearmongering to convert. What’s wrong with this picture?

At the risk of offending half the people who read this (not that I haven’t already): it’s a cult. They get you in however they can, and then they guilt you into acting on their beliefs.

And all of this is happening while you’re supposed to be celebrating the life of a great man who was deeply loved by his friends, family, and community.

It really disgusts me.