Pros and Cons
Mar 25th, 2008 by Amanda
Well mostly pros…
| One Option | Second Option |
|---|---|
| Amazing job | Lots of family (9) I want to be close to |
| A handful of friends (4) I want to be close to | Trees |
| Small Group | Green Grass |
| Sweet Tea | |
| Bojangles | |
| Four distinct seasons | |
| Houses with actual yards and driveways | |
| Driving distance to both the mountains and the ocean | |
| Eastern NC BBQ |
I could list the cons. But it’s pretty simple. The cons of option 1 are not having any of option 2. And the cons of option 2 are not having any of option 1.
So you would think this would be an easy decision, right? There are obviously more pros to option 2. But my concern is weight. Particularly the weight of my amazing job. That one isn’t necessarily the same level of importance as sweet tea and green grass, you know?
How important should it be? I love what I do, and I just adore the company I work for. But is it really worth it? In the past, I’ve said that it is because, honestly, how often can someone in this country honestly say they love their job? Can I be just as happy with another company if I have a job that is very similar to what I’m doing now?
Sitting at work today, knowing that I’ve been thinking about this stuff, I kept thinking I’ll never leave this job! But honestly, as soon as I was out of the building and on my way home, all I could think was how much I don’t want to be in CO anymore. The two thoughts don’t exactly jive, do they?
I don’t have to make a decision today. I’ve got several months before my lease is up, but this is what’s on my mind. And probably will be for awhile.
Too bad it’d be a long commute if you kept your job and lived in NC. I’ll be praying for you about this. Since you’re divided in what you want to do, maybe use this opportunity to ask God what He wants. As much as I’ll miss you, if God’s will is for you to be in NC, I know He’ll provide for all of your needs there. (A job, good friends, etc.)
hmm…that’s a hard one. Are there similar types of places to work at in NC?
I would say that you need to choose based on what you want for your future, not what you had in the past. Can you see yourself marrying a Coloradan, raising kids there, living a long life there, amybe moving somewhere else that isn’t close to NC? All those may be way in the future for you because you’re still so young, but sometimes we just know what feels right for us.
I remember living in Tennessee for many years and I loved it. It was beautiful, I had made some friends, but I just couldn’t see myself there for the rest of my life. While I appreciated so much about it and the people I knew there, I just didn’t fit there for the long-term.
Maybe it’s the same for you and Colorado?
That’s exactly it. I’ve always said that I don’t want to raise kids here and that when (if) I get married I would move back to NC.
That’s where I want to be. That’s where I want to have a family.
I for one will not pray for you.
However I will offer my thoughts, and I hope they help to provide some sort of decision and action on your part. I will also hope the best for you, knowing that either decision will work out just fine. Statistical Karma is on your side.
#1) you left out inertia. people generally don’t like change. Even me, in my logical mind I embrace change whole heartedly. Change leads to new opportunities, new things, and keeps life from stagnating (you only have one, lets make the best of it!). however my emotional side loves comfort and will only embrace change if discomfort has reached high levels. Change brings work, it brings chaos. Emotion often wins due to inertia, its harder to change things than to leave them alone. If the idea that you may be staying due to inertia revolts you, I hope this helps you to fight that.
#2) In engineering, we often have multiple ideas about tackling a problem. Often we do what you started to do (its called a pugh diagram or pugh chart). And what do we do? We actually assign weights to the pros and cons and this limits the choices. However you have already gotten it down to 2, so an exercise like this is probably useless. But you could try it out, and then see how you react emotionally to the answer.
3) I think you have already made your decision. Your last comment reveals it. Its not a matter of ‘if’. Its a matter of ‘when’. Why not now?
Choose a date! Make your preparations, and pack your bags! The south needs the population of fundamentalists diluted!
Good luck amanda, I dont know if I provided any help, but I am sure that now that you know how good a job can be, you can find another one. its also OK to leave jobs that dont work for you. As for your friends in CO, it is true that time and distance tend to let relationships go dark, but there are too many ways to communicate these days to prevent you from letting go of them!
Amanda, I pray that your decision will come soon and will not torment you. I want to let you in on a little known secret in the leasing industry in Colorado.
If you get a Job in North Carolina, and you call it a “job transfer” you may loose your deposit, but they can not penalize you if you move out of state. They can not collect on you out of state.
Now as far as the kick butt job you have….that is a tougher part of the scenario.
As far as love is concerned, there are bachelors all over this fair planet, some should be bachelors, others dont want to be and can only imagine marrying a polite, free thinking southern girl. I would imagine more then a few of them have headed south in search of that girl. Know anyone that fits that picture?
Oh I didn’t mean to imply that I wanted to move back to look for love! That’s not it, at all. I’m actually mostly content in my singleness (I said mostly!). It’ll come all in God’s good timing.
Nor did I mean to imply you implication as taken that you were moving for love. (did that make any sense)
Just sweetening the pot a little bit.
“Four distinct seasons”
Have you been to North Carolina recently? Maybe it’s just because I live on the coast, but these seasons are certainly not distinct. Hope you’re doing well, girl!
Jay! It’s so good to see you back in the blogosphere!
Okay… so four distinct seasons might be pushing it. But there are at least three!