God Gives Good Parking Spots
Jan 9th, 2008 by Amanda
I’ve never been a fan of Joel Osteen. And this article in Slate Magazine does a really good job of explaining why I don’t like the man.
And each of those sermons kicks off with Osteen’s patented chant, with those 47,000 voices declaring, “This is my Bible. I am what it says I am. I have what it says I have. I do what it says I can do,” and building to an oddly colorful climax: “I am about to receive the incorruptible, indestructible, ever-living seed of God, and I will never be the same. Never, never, never. I will never be the same. In Jesus’ name. Amen.”
The chant is about as close as Osteen’s relentlessly upbeat preaching ever comes to a theological doctrine, and it captures many of the key themes behind his runaway appeal. There’s the stark individualist ethos that lies behind the definition of scripture as first and foremost an agent of identity change. There’s the curiously infantile quality of both the act of the chant and its diction. (No matter how emphatically an arena full of believers may shout “Never, never, never,” they always sound like pouting toddlers.) Most of all, though, there’s the vividly sexualized power ascribed to the Word of God, which serves as a sort of skeleton key to the Osteen phenomenon.
The sad thing is that a lot of the things that he says sound good. Even when reading some quotes by him, I found myself nodding in agreement. Then i’d read a little bit more and realize how much crap it’s really full of.
Meh, the line between “daft truism” and “deep insight” is a bit shaky at the best of times. Even someone who’s full of crap can occasionally be worth listening to. I feel the same way about the Bible.
Amanda,
I’m afraid that it gets even worse because a couple weeks ago Osteen even said practicing Mormons are Christians on Fox News Sunday. You can see the video for yourself here in John Osteen Blesses The Mormon Church
I personally don’t understand the “Mormons aren’t Christian” thing… and I live in a LDS dominated area. Why is it such a big freakin’ deal what they call themselves?
IAMB,
“I live in a LDS dominated area. Why is it such a big freakin’ deal what they call themselves?” I did for many years as well and it’s not my intent to argue with you. So, if you want to know what the issue is I encourage you to read this article: Mormon Church: Deity of Christ.
Certainly people are free to believe whatever they want to believe; but if they wish to call themselves Christian, then they need to believe and teach what Christians do.
“They need to beleive and teach what Christians do”
Ok, according to which domination? Who gets the right to say, yes you are, or no you are not, a Christian? Seems kind of sketchy to me.
“Seems kind of sketchy to me.”
Somehow I think that’s the way you want it to be as well.
No, I don’t want it to be that way. Small, oft times fringe groups of christians shouldn’t be determining who’s in and who’s out. There are many different beliefs and interpretations regarding what it means to be a christian, and each has a right to his or her beliefs. That doesn’t make them any less christian, and it’s a shame some people have the audacity to think they own the market when it comes to christianity.
Actually, it was the Mormon founder, Joseph Smith, who decided that the two (Mormonism and Christianity) could NOT fit together, which I learned through a Mormon.