I love New Years. I really do. Want to know why? Because every year, the SciFi channel runs a Twilight Zone marathon. I must say it’s better on New Years Eve, because the early half hour shows were better than the later hour long shows, but still… one day a year I get to emerse myself in the wonderfully strange.

My trip was a good one. I think next year I may go for a shorter period of time, but all in all, it was a raging success compared to last year. My mom had surgery yesterday, but she went home today and is doing well enough that when she called me she sounded incredibly chipper. The rental car I got to drive for 11 days was sweet.

2008.
Red.
Dodge Caliber.

‘Nuff said.

I really liked driving that little gem around for a week and a half. It was hard to give it back!

One of the things I hate about going home is that it seems like no matter what you do, you end up disappointing someone. Or everyone. That was frustrating. Having to tell people no made me sad. My stepdad had thought I would come out and stay at his house overnight, but I hadn’t planned on it. He was really disappointed. My dad wanted me to come back and spend another night with him, but I couldn’t. My granny wanted me to do some things with her, but I already had plans with my mom so I couldn’t. Little things like that. I suppose if those are the worst things that happened, then I did pretty good.

It was really good to see everyone though.

I miss North Carolina. Something fierce. I find myself wishing for the day that I’m financially able to buy a house and move back. Because I would never buy a house in Denver. As much as I don’t mind living in the city, I’m a country girl at heart. And when I put down those fixed roots, it won’t be in the city.

One thing I don’t miss is the racial tension that still lives on in the South. Not a day went by that I didn’t hear or end up involved in a conversation about black people and white people. Seriously. Not a day went by without one. I was a little shocked at first – apparantly two years away had stripped my memory of such things. One thing that struck me as ironic though was something my Papa said to me. He thinks my mom should come live out here with me. He said, “You know, Amanda, I know that because you live out there you think better than we do. You have better thoughts than we do out here.”

Um. If you know that, then why don’t you change your own thoughts? If you knew you could (should) have a better way of thinking, why wouldn’t you? I understand that people were raised a certain way and that’s why things are still the way they are. But still… if you’re self-aware enough to know that something’s wrong, and you don’t do anything to change it, what does that say about your character?