Monthly Archives: May 2007

Love and Purpose

by Mandi

The last several days have been a roller coaster for me. I did something I absolutely should not have, and it’s weighed heavily on me. At first, I didn’t care. But gradually, I began to realize the ramifications of my actions and how much I disappointed my Father. I won’t go into detail (Eph. 5:12), but I can say that GOD IS GOOD. He pushed me to the point of absolute conviction and caused a change in heart and attitude. He has also awakened my sense of purpose in life.

Today I read Ephesians. It seems like everything I’m reading/hearing this week is about the same general thing. It’s affirming my sense of purpose.

The chastisement continued, but not quite as head on as in previous days:

“…you must no longer live as the Gentiles do, in the futility of their thinking. They are darkened in their understanding and seperated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them due to the hardening of their hearts. HAving lost all sensitivity, they have given themselves over to sensuality so as to indulge in every kind of impurity, with a continual lust for more.”

“You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.”

But on the whole, the overall theme of the book (at least the one that stood out to me today) is that of love. Paul tells the Ephesians to be rooted and established in love. To be kind and compassionate to one another. I can’t help but think that I’m not usually that way. In particular in one relationship in my life. A very close friend of mine and I have lost a lot of the closeness that we had because I tend to be bitter and mean-spirited around him. D, if you’re reading this, I’m sorry. I have a lot to work on, and I know that. I’m not very kind and compassionate to you, and I should be. You’ve been nothing but a fantastic friend to me, and you don’t deserve the way I’ve treated you. Please forgive me for my shortcomings.


NANC

by Mandi

I found out some GREAT news! I can still get NANC certified because I can do the training at home!

NANC is the National Association of Nouthetic Counselors. What is that?

While the name is new, the sort of counseling done by nouthetic counselors is not. From biblical times onward, God’s people have counseled nouthetically. The word itself is biblical. The New Testament was written in Greek, from which the noun nouthesia (verb: noutheteo) comes. It is a term used largely by the apostle Paul which is sometimes translated “admonish, correct or instruct.” The term, which best describes biblical counseling, occurs in such passages as Romans 15:14: “I myself am convinced about you, my brothers, that you yourselves are full of goodness, filled with all knowledge, and competent to counsel one another.” In that passage, the apostle was encouraging members of the Roman church to do informal, mutual counseling, something that all Christians today should learn, as well. On the other hand, the leaders of a congregation are to counsel nouthetically in a formal manner as a part of their ministry: “Now we ask you, brothers, to recognize those who labor among you, and manage you in the Lord, and counsel you.”

Because the New Testament term is larger than the English word “counsel,” and because it doesn’t carry any of the “freight” that is attached to the latter term, we have simply imported the biblical term into English. In that way, the full force of the biblical concept of counseling may be set forth while avoiding the many contradictory connotations surrounding the English one. The three ideas found in the word nouthesia are Confrontation, Concern and Change. To put it simply, nouthetic counseling consists of lovingly confronting people out of deep concern in order to help them make those changes that God requires. By confrontation we mean that one Christian personally gives counsel to another from the Scriptures. He does not confront him with his own ideas or the ideas of others. He limits his counsel strictly to that which may be found in the Bible, believing that “All Scripture is breathed out by God and useful for teaching, for conviction, for correction and for disciplined training in righteousness in order to fit and fully equip the man from God for every good task.” (2 Timothy 3:16,17) The nouthetic counselor believes that all that is needed to help another person love God and his neighbor as he should, as the verse above indicates, may be found in the Bible.

By concern we mean that counseling is always done for the benefit of the counselee. His welfare is always in view in biblical counseling. The apostle Paul put it this way: “I am not writing these things to shame you, but to counsel you as my dear children.” (1 Corinthians 4:14) Plainly, the familial nature of the word noutheteo appears in this verse. There is always a warm, family note to biblical counseling which is done among the saints of God who seek to help one another become more like Christ. Christians consider their counseling to be a part of the sanctification process whereby one Christian helps another get through some difficulty that is hindering him from moving forward in his spiritual growth.

By change we mean that counseling is done because there is something in another Christian’s life that fails to meet the biblical requirements and that, therefore, keeps him from honoring God. All counseling — biblical or otherwise– attempts change. Only biblical counselors know what a counselee should become as the result of counseling: he should look more like Christ. He is the Standard. Biblical counseling is done by Christians who are convinced that God is able to make the changes that are necessary as His Word is ministered in the power of the Spirit. It is their hope to help every interested church develop a nouthetic counseling program that will be a blessing to all of the members of that congregation. The importance of such counseling in churches is underscored by the words of Paul as he described his ministry in Ephesus: “Therefore, be alert, remembering that for three years, night and day, I didn’t stop counseling each one of you with tears.” (Acts 20:31) The regularity and intense nature of Paul’s counsel during his three-year ministry at Ephesus is emphasized by these words. If Paul found it necessary to counsel nouthetically for that entire period, as he said, surely our churches need it, too.

I began the certification process in 2005, but had to stop when I left North Carolina. Now, I may actually be able to complete the process! The materials cost $245, so it will be awhile before I can actually do it, but at least there is hope that I can finish. :)


Don’t Almost Give

by Mandi

I heard about an incredible campaign today.

Don’t Almost Give: Because almost giving is the same as not giving at all.

Give your time. Your old clothes. Your money. There are lots of ways to give.


I’m from Galatia

by Mandi

When Paul wrote to the churches in Galatia, he was writing about me.

I am astonished that you are so quickly deserting the one who called you by the grace of Christ and are turning to a different gospel–which is really no gospel at all.

Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God? Or am I trying to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ.

Are you so foolish? After beginning with the Spirit, are you now trying to attain your goal by human effort?

Formerly, when you were slaves to those who by nature are not gods. But now that you know God–or rather are known by God–how is it that you are turning back to those weak and miserable principles? Do you wish to be enslaved by them all over again? … I fear for you, that somehow I have wasted my efforts on you.

Stand firm, then, and not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.

You who are trying to be justified by law have been alienated from Christ; you have fallen away from grace.

 You, my brothers, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the sinful nature; rather, serve one another in love.

So I say, live by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature. For the sinful nature desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the sinful nature. They are in conflict with each other, so that you do not do what you want.

The one who sows to please his sinful nature, from that nature will reap destruction; the one who sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life.

I’m left wondering… how many times do I have to give in to my sinful nature before I completely fall away from God?


Attitude, Prayer, Gossip, and more

by Mandi

Last week I made a commitment here to grow more like Christ in thoughts, words, and actions. The next day I started a “daily” quiet time and shared what I learned here. Then I didn’t pick my Bible up again until today…ten days later. So I reread the first two chapters of James so they would be fresh in my mind, and then I finished the book.

I still don’t like it.

You’ll remember that I wrote about spiritual maturity and how God is showing me just how far from it I am. Well He kept it up today. Last week I wrote,

The main thing is that regardless of how I feel, I need to just do it. I’ve heard the truth. I know what I should be doing and how I should be acting. But there’s a world of difference between knowing and doing.

Today I read:

Anyone, then, who knows the good he ought to do and doesn’t do it, sins. (James 3:17)

Come on! Wasn’t last week enough? Obviously not… And that’s a hard pill to swallow when you think you’re an all around good person.

I was also convicted of gossip. I don’t gossip too often, but I do it occasionally. I like to “be in the know” and then spread what I know. But God said:

With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in God’s likeness. Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers, this should not be. Can both fresh water and salt water flow from the same spring? (James 3:9-11)

I realize that cursing and gossip are two different things, but the application here is the same. The mouth that we use to praise God should not be used to tear down others. And gossip definitely tears down.

I often consider myself a “wise” person. People tell me I am quite often. And secretly, I love it. But when you apply my “wisdom” to the godly standard…it falls short.

Who is wise and understanding among you? Let him show it by his good life, by deeds done in the humility that comes from wisdom. But if you harbor bitter enby and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast about it or deny the truth. Such “wisdom” does not come down from heaven but is earthly, unspiritual, of the devil. For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice.

But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere. (James 3:13-17)

Ack! That’s all I can really say. Pure. Me? Nope. I’m chock full of wicked thoughts. Impartial. Me? Nope. I tend to be judgemental–especially towards those whom I perceive to be judgemental! That tells me that I have “wisdom” but not wisdom.

At one point in Chapter 4, James echoes what Jesus said at the Sermon on the Mount:

Above all, my brothers, do not swear–not by heaven or by earth or by anything else. Let your “Yes” be yes, and your “No,” no, or you will be condemned. (James 4:12)

Is my word really worth that much? I don’t think so.

And lastly:

Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective. (James 5:16)

This one is probably harder for me to deal with than all the rest. I don’t want to confess my sins to others because I’m ashamed of my sins. If I tell you what I really struggle with, will I lose my credibility? Will I lose your friendship? Will I be thought of as less of a Christian because of what I do struggle with?

The bottom line is this: Reading this short 5 chapter book has shown me how woefully short I fall of the glory of God. 

But I do know that hope is not lost! It’s discouraging to face yourself like this, but in all honesty, until you see yourself for what you really are, you can’t begin to change. I’ve always “known” that I’m a sinner, but I’ve never really looked inward to see specifically what needs to change. Now that I see some of it, I know where to start.

Trackposted to Pirate’s Cove, third world county, The Random Yak, Woman Honor Thyself, Dumb Ox Daily News, Conservative Cat, and Pursuing Holiness, thanks to Linkfest Haven Deluxe.


Online Dating and Christians

by Mandi

Here’s a Pastoral Response to Online Dating by one of the pastors of Covenant Life Church (home of author Joshua Harris). It’s well thought out, and is certainly needed in this world where single Christians often feel singled out as poor Christians because they haven’t yet started a family.


Cleanup

by Mandi

Sorry, folks. You’re gonna see some stuff re-posted today because I wanted to enable comments on one of the pages I have linked to at the top. The only way I can do that is if I make it an individual post. So bear with me today!


Mandi Kaye’s Southern Dictionary

by Mandi

Hey y’all! Welcome to my Southern Dictionary! I hope you get a good laugh out of what you read, but you should realize that the words and phrases listed are, in fact, real words that Southerners (including me, the displaced Southerner) use on a regular basis in conversation. 

Aggravatin’ – bothersome. “Quit aggravatin’ me!”

Bad mouth – speak negatively about. “Don’t bad mouth me!”

Buggy – grocery cart. “This buggy is full! Who y’all planning to feed?”

Cocola – Coca Cola. “Will you get me a cocola?”

Coke – any soft drink. “I’d like a coke.” “We only serve Pepsi.” “That’s fine, just give me a coke.”

Commode – toilet. “Did you flush the commode?”

Darn tootin‘ – for sure; correct. “You’re darn tootin’ we’re gonna win!”

Dinner – the noon meal. “Come over for Sunday dinner.”

Directly – a short while. “I’ll be back directly.”

Do what? – an expression of surprise or disbelief; huh. “I’m runnin’ off to get married!” “Do what?”

Done – already. “I’ve done gassed up the Pontiac.”

Drew up – shrunk. “I put my sweater in the dryer and it drew up.”

Fair to middlin’ – moderately good. “How are you?” “Oh, I’m fair to middlin’.”

Fix – prepare. “I have to fix the coffee.”

Fixin’ to – about to. “I’m fixin’ to call my mom.”

Heap – large quantity. “I’m going to be in a heap of trouble when my daddy finds out!”

Hear tell – form of “hear it told.” Often conveys that the information was passed second hand. “I hear tell that the new mini-mall is going up next month.”

How come? – why? “How come the grass is green?”

Hunkey Dorey – great. “Everything is hunkey dorey!”

Light bread – white bread. “I need light bread for these sandwiches.”

Lightning Bugs – fireflies. “I’m gonna catch me some lightning bugs!”

Malarkey – BS. “He’s full of malarkey.”

Might could - possibily or probably. “I might could fix that for you.”

Pick at – pester or annoy. “Don’t pick at your sister!”

Piddlin’ - small or inferior. “They only gave him a piddlin’ 1% raise.”

Pull to – shut. “Pull the door to.”

Rescue Squad – ambulance. “Call the rescue squad!”

Sass – speak in an impertinent manner. “Don’t sass me, young lady!”

Supper – the evening meal. “What’s for supper?” or “Stay for supper.”

Sweet milk – milk that isn’t buttermilk. “I’m out of sweet milk and light bread.”

Tore up – distraught. “He’s real tore up about it.”

Tote – carry. “Tote this in the house.”

Used to could – used to be able to. “I used to could sleep in on the weekends.”

Wear out – to spank. “When I get ahold of that boy, I’m gonna wear him out!”

Y’all - You all. ”Can y’all help me?” NOTE: Ya’ll is the incorrect spelling.


Response to debate to prove God

by Mandi

Matt has posted a great response to the recent “debate” between Kirk Cameron and Ray Comfort (“The Way of the Master”) and Brian and Kelly (of the “Rational Response Squad”).

I didn’t watch the whole thing (Matt’s got the youtube links), because I got very frustrated very early in. I didn’t even see the atheist responses. I got frustrated with Ray, who was preaching, and Kirk, who gave his testimony as “proof.”

Don’t get me wrong. I think what both of them had to say was worth hearing–just not in the context that they were in. They told everyone that they could scientifically prove the existence of God apart from faith, and then spoke of faith and feelings.

I think they deliberately mislead people in order to get a large audience to get their message heard.

Perhaps that’s harsh, but that’s what it seemed like from watching them. I will, however, agree with Matt’s closing statements:

I have a feeling it will strengthen the beliefs on both sides. I hope that people will listen to the petition of Comfort: just open your heart up a bit and honestly and earnestly search for God (a rough paraphrase). I don’t think the two sides were represented very well. No offense to Comfort and Cameron, but they aren’t scientists and couldn’t hope to actually scientifically prove God’s existence. Brian and Kelly (who didn’t want to give out their last names… I don’t really understand that) of The Rational Response Squad are also poor choices. Quite frankly “Rational” is somewhat of a misnomer in my opinion. Kelly was extremely condescending and Brian didn’t really listen I don’t think. The be blunt, they were asses. I think there are a number of atheists that could have been chosen to debate that would have been more eloquent and knowledgeable. Just poor choices all around. But I have a feeling that “legitimate” (I know it is somewhat dangerous to throw that word around) scientists on both sides wouldn’t bother to debate this. That being said, overall, I wasn’t completely disappointed in Comfort and Cameron. I really was quite worried initially about what they would say. And while I think they did say some silly things that I don’t agree with and could have hurt the “cause” they did ok.


Christian Carnival CLXXII

by Mandi

This week’s carnival is up at Crossroads. Highlights:

I don’t usually post when I disagree with an article in the Carnival, but I have to say something about Defense of Public Schools???  Elizabeth takes a look at five “common” Christian defenses of Public Schools and essentially tears them apart. Her stance in the end is that Christians shouldn’t send their kids to public school because “it’s hard for me to understand sending children to spend at least six hours a day in the midst of temptation.”

My early childhood is somewhat fuzzy. I’m not positive of how the timeline went, but I do know that I went to a Christian school for half of my kindergarten year and was homeschooled for the rest of it because my parents couldn’t afford the private school. I also remember that while my class was learning how to read “See spot run,” I was reading Little House on the Prairie. My mom homeschooled me half of kindergarten and all of first and second grades. Curriculum wise, I was six years old and had completed the second grade. My parents opted to send me to public school after that, and because of my age they placed me in the first grade. Obviously I was bored to tears because I was ahead of what they were doing. So they moved me into a combination first and second grade class. Technically, I was in the first grade, but they had me doing second grade work (still bored). The next year, they put me in 3rd grade. My transcripts show that I skipped the second grade. During that school year, I ended up back in Christian school. I don’t remember anything I was taught that year except that I was paddled for lying to the teacher, when in reality it was a miscommunication. I also remember that the pastor/principal of that church/school told my dad that he should do a better job of controlling my mom and that when they got divorced that year he told my dad he was going to hell for not keeping his family together.

That was the last time I went to Christian school.

I graduated from public school, more educated than friends I had who did go to a Christian school. My faith was strong and intact. And I have every intention of sending my own children to public school. If parents aren’t teaching their kids in the home how to keep their faith strong in the midst of adversity, then the problems they have run deeper than whether or not to send their kids to public school.


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